I Am That Girl Now

Saturday, April 16, 2005

The things I eat are so wrong.

See, we decided in our household quite some time ago that all starches were created equal when the emphasis of the dish is in the toppings. Sometimes this stretches to other foods topped with great toppings, or switching salad in for the starch or other food. Hence we have a "baked potato" themed salad that's topped with cheese and bacon bits and green onions (or caramelized onions) and creamy sour-cream-style fat-free yogurt dressing. (It's my Hub's favorite.) And sometimes we have "buffalo wing" salad, with a fat-free yogurt dressing flavored heavily with Frank's Red Hot wing sauce and topped with blue cheese crumbles and chopped celery.

And, of course, there's my beloved "Buffalo Popcorn", in which I shake Frank's onto the bowl, throw in the air-popped popcorn, shake on more Frank's, roll the popcorn around with my hands to mix the flavoring in, and dust the whole thing with garlic powder and salt. That has darn near saved my life after discovering those buffalo-wing-style pretzel chunks.

However, I may have outdone myself this time. I have to post this here because otherwise I will pop with the knowledge, and I'm pretty sure that if I put this anywhere that people actually read, one of my friends will come up to me and say "WHY IN THE NAME OF GOD WOULD YOU EAT THAT?"

It came about as a series of logical steps in my mind, though. I swear.

Logical step 1: I have yam noodles. I meant to get the kind that Hungry Girl has been talking about of late, the kind that are made of tofu and yam flour, but the nearest Whole Foods had nothing of the sort and so I had to find the regular kind at a nearby Asian market. (Yam noodles, for folks who haven't encountered them, are like glass thread noodles, only even more so. And they have zero calories. Weird, but I like 'em.)

Logical step 2: If I have zero-calorie noodles, that means I could go nuts on the sauce. I'd been meaning to do a lovely fettucini alfredo with the fettucini-style noodles (which I could not find and now will have to order online, dammit), but with definitely Asian-style noodles I couldn't countenance it. I felt I needed something more Asian.

Logical step 3: Hey, Asian food has that fantastic peanut sauce. And I seem to remember hearing that if you microwave peanut butter, it gets all melty. I could make peanut sauce!

Logical step 4: Hey, I wonder if this could be a good way to be able to get myself to only have a single serving of peanut butter? Because usually, just one serving of peanut butter isn't enough to cover a piece of bread, and having full-fat peanut butter AND bread means I'm spending a whole lot of calories on stuff that's there to fill me up... and I have to admit, I eat peanut-butter sandwiches far too fast, and end up wanting more. Eating just the peanut butter definitely isn't enough to be filling.

Logical step 5: I much prefer peanut butter and jelly sandwiches to mere peanut butter ones.

Logical step 6 (okay, this is where I ended up no longer counting this as really "logical"): Clearly, what I need to see is what will happen if I make peanut-butter-and-jelly noodles.

I made 'em.

I liked 'em.

So there.

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