I Am That Girl Now

Thursday, May 26, 2005

It sucks. It all sucks.

I think I hate it when my Hub gets sick more than when I get sick. When I'm the one that's sick, all I have to do is suffer, really. When he's sick, I have to pick up the slack for the entire spousal support system-- cook the food, feed the cats, clean the house, do the laundry, take out the garbage-- all by myself, as well as taking care of him and picking up after him because he becomes too weak to take dishes to the sink or pick up his underwear from where he took it off in the hallway (WHY UNDRESS IN THE HALLWAY? WHY???) or put Kleenex in the trash can to his right instead of leaving them scattered over the couch on his left. Sigh. Men.

Bad enough normally, but this week my parents are coming to town for the holiday weekend. They arrive tomorrow. I'm not just having to pick up the normal amount of slack, I'm having to do that AND do all the frantic parent-prep all by myself. And, because I still don't quite have the swing of BFL, I have to find time to cook so that I can eat. What's funny is that normally this would have me throwing my hands in the air and saying "Screw it, we'll just order food until this storm has passed," but this time I'm holding on like grim death because I don't want to have all this work happening AND have WW energy drain or fat-eatin' lethargy. Cooking may be a pain in the ass right now, but eating this way is all that's keeping me going and making it possible to get anything done at all, so I am damn well going to find time to cook.

I've been slaving away at housework and taking care of El Hubbo every single minute I'm home and conscious, and still managing to make my BFL meals and get my exercise in. I desperately needed extra sleep Tuesday night... didn't get it. Needed it even more on Wednesday... didn't get it. Then this morning the alarm clock, for reasons known only to it, chose to reset itself so it almost forty minutes fast. That, I tell you, was forty minutes of sleep that I really, really resent losing. I've been completely brain-dead all day, no reading comprehension skills, walking into things, tripping, yawning constantly. I told my boss I'm not coming in tomorrow because it would not be good for anybody. He's cool with that, even though it's the day before the long weekend. God bless cool bosses everywhere.

What's funnier still is that I haven't gone crazy and binged yet. Don't get me wrong, my brain has been stuck on the idea of food constantly, and I'm hungrier than normal, but somehow my stomach being at least moderately full, plus the fact that I'm scheduled to eat a REAL MEAL within the next three hours, calms me and distracts me. This is good. This is definitely good.

I picked up Eating For Life last night out of sheer desperation-- my Hub is still freaking out over how to feed me, and I figure this ought to help. (I made the fish tacos last night. Yum.) He has promised to look at it. Granted, he also promised to look through Body For Life and hasn't done that, so the grain of salt I have taken with that promise is GIGANTIC, but at least he's aware that it's out there. I can cook from it, at least, and that'll take some of the pressure off.

Granted, he says he's buying us dinner tonight, which means I get the headache of trying to figure out what I can order. Oh, my aching head.

6 Comments:

  • Go, Meg, Go! You're going to get through this weekend and be able to use it as arsenal against the "Oh, fuck it" voices in the future. Yee haw!

    By Anonymous Cynthia, at 5:13 PM  

  • It is good to hear you are at least sticking to your plan. I hope eating out is not too difficult.

    By Blogger ms ralph, at 5:18 PM  

  • Yeah, what they said! You've been through worse - and have the posts to prove it... so do what you can and try to enjoy your day off and the weekend.

    By Anonymous Stenya, at 6:03 PM  

  • i really like the eating for life book. we mostly use it for dinner ideas (i'm not a big fan of the pudding/protein desserts, of which there are lots :-) we eat the chicken parmesan on whole wheat spaghetti a lot. i like the bed of spinach idea and, when we had it last time, i added a bunch of cut up cherry tomatoes. yum!

    the other thing that's easy and yummy is the enchiladas. my hubby made them the other day with sauce from trader joe's. we make a full 9x12 pan of them and then eat them for lunches/dinners for days. really good with some fat-free Quark, your favorite salsa or pico de gallo, some sliced avo, some fresh tomatoes.

    By Anonymous tszuj, at 12:29 PM  

  • Oh men are SO useless when they are sick! Honestly, one sniffle and you'd think they were dying.

    Good luck with the weekend!

    By Blogger ladymisstree, at 4:43 AM  

  • You GO girl! I'm glad you're sticking with it. I hope the weekend worked out FABULOUSLY and you feel even MORE accomplished now that it's over.

    The one tag line I'll recite from BFL in this case is "Progress not perfection" - and I don't mean that as in 'screw up, it doesn't matter'; but as in: 'Every time life hands you lemons, you have a choice to make lemonade!'. You've done the hard part just STARTING this uphill slog. You've been WONDERFUL at sticking with it. CONGRATULATIONS on another hurdle met. :-) May you revel in the recognition of your lemonade making skills today, and all week. :-)

    By Anonymous Shawna, at 4:53 PM  

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